


Voltron who?

by LamarandKadar



Category: Doctor Who, Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Assassination Attempt(s), Awkward Kissing, Bananas, F/M, Female Pronouns for Pidge | Katie Holt, Gen, M/M, Multi, One Shot Collection
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-03-11
Updated: 2017-03-11
Packaged: 2018-10-02 19:09:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,136
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10225106
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LamarandKadar/pseuds/LamarandKadar
Summary: Sort of a Doctor who and Voltron mix where it's has lines from Doctor who but with Voltron characters and flare! Series of one shots.





	1. The one word test

**Author's Note:**

> No relationship in this short but there will be klance in the next one.

The young lady was escorted into a large castle by an Altean gentleman with orange hair and a mustache. He walked her through the immense halls and eventually they arrived at a waiting room.  
“Mistress Allura will be with you in a few moments. Until then you should make yourself at home and be aware of the rules used when strangers should speak with her.”  
The girl sat down in a chair and took her coat off.  
“What exactly are the rules used when speaking with her?” She asked.  
“You must confine yourself to one word responses. Understand? Only one word.”  
“Why only one word?”  
“Mistress Allura believes that excess words tend to mask the truth.” The man walked to the side and an Altean woman came in and sat down across from her.  
“I am Princess Allura of Altea. I understand you have been seeking Voltron.”  
“Yes.”  
“Why?”  
“Curiosity.”  
“About what?”  
“Voltron.”  
“And about them?”  
“Yes.”  
“What do you want from them?”  
“Help.”  
“Why would they help you?”  
“Danger.”  
“Again why would they help you?”  
“Kindness.”  
“They are not kind.”  
“No?”  
“Voltron doesn’t help people. Not now not ever. They once protected this universe but not anymore. Voltron is not your liberation nor your way to freedom. Do you understand what I am saying to you?”  
“Words.” Allura looked surprised at the girl's response.  
“Things were different a long time ago. They were kind. Yes. Heros even and saved multiple star systems. But they suffered some losses and now they prefer to stay hidden away in the shadows for fear of something worse. Kindly chose a word to indicate your understanding of this.”  
“Imperfect.”  
“We are Voltron’s allies. We assist in their isolation but it does not mean that we approve of it. So a test for you… give me a message to send to Voltron. A message that tells them all about your predicament and all the danger. And above all explain why they should help you.”  
The girl opened her lips to speak but Allura quieted her.  
“But do it in one word.”  
The girl fell silent and Allura sat up straight in her chair.  
“I’m guessing you are finding that it is near impossible to find this word and wondering if one even exists. Let’s see if the odds are with you.”  
\----------  
A cell phone buzzed on the table where the four paladins sat. They tried to ignore the buzz but after a while Keith picked up the phone.  
“What is it Allura?” Keith asked bitterly.  
“I gave her the one word test.”  
“And…”  
“And… Her answer was Shiro.” The room was dead silent and Keith dropped the phone.  
“We’ll be there in thirty minutes.”  
Allura hung up and turned to Corran.  
“Prepare the castle for take off. We have to meet the paladins at the intended coordinates.”


	2. Let's kill Zarkon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> K is Keith  
> L is Lance  
> P is Pidge  
> H is Hunk  
> S is Shiro  
> U is Ulaz  
> Z is Zarkon

K: “Really? You just had to make a crop circle to get my attention?”  
P: “Well, you never answer your phone.”  
S: shows Keith a newspaper with a v shaped crop circle “We had to make sure that you saw it.”  
K: squints at the picture “Is there supposed to be a ship parked over there?”  
H: “Um, I don’t think so.”   
Everyone turns to see Lance coming from the tall stalks of corn.  
L: “You said he was brooding. You never said he was hot.”  
K: blushes  
S,P,&H: “Lance!?”  
S: “Lance where did you get the ship?”  
L: “It’s mine...ish.”  
H: “Lance, not again!”  
P: “If you keep this up you’ll end up as a prisoner of Zarkon.”  
K: “Wait, wait, wait, wait. I’m confused and very lost. You never said I was hot?”  
L: looks at the red lion “Is that a lion of Voltron!? This is amazing! I’ve heard all about you Keith Kogane. I’m their old friend.”  
K: “Then why don’t I know you? I danced with almost everyone at Allura’s coronation party. The women were brilliant, but the men were a bit shy.”  
L: “I don’t dance at parties.”  
(Sirens start blaring)  
L: “And that’s me out of time.” pulls a gun out on Keith  
S: “Lance!”  
P: “For goodness sake.”  
H: “What are you doing?”  
L: “I need to get out of here now.”  
K: “Anywhere in particular?”  
L: “Well… I have a gun, and you have a lion. What the hell, let’s kill Zarkon.”  
\----------  
The red lion is flying out of control.  
K: “You shot it! You shot my lion! You shot her consul!”  
L: “Well it’s your fault!”  
K: “How is it my fault!? You are the one that has the gun!”  
L: “You said guns don’t work in here! You said we were in a state of temporal grace!”  
K: “That was a clever lie you idiot! Anyone could tell that was a clever lie!”  
\----------  
U: walks into Zarkon’s throne room  
Z: “Who are you? Who let you in?”  
U: “Do not call for help. This room has been sound screened. The blade of Marmora has found you guilty. Prepare for your execution.” hears a sound “Wait, what’s that noise?”  
Red lion crashes into the room knocking Ulaz off his feet. Everyone comes out of the lion.  
K: “Everyone get out of red!”  
H: “Where are we?”  
P: “It’s a room. Duh!”  
H: “What room?”  
P: “I don’t know what room it is! I haven’t memorized every room in the universe, yet.”  
K: “Don’t go in my lion.” takes the gun away from Lance  
L: “Hey!”  
K: “Don’t breath in the smoke, it’s bad. It’s deadly because someone shot my lion’s consul!”  
S: leans over Ulaz “I think this guy is hurt. Oh, no. He’s fine.”  
K: hides gun in a fruit bowl. To person behind the overturned throne. “Sorry, is this your place? Had a bit of a problem with my vehicle. All Lance’s fault. Let’s pretend nothing happened.” sees who he’s talking to “Oh.”  
Z: “Thank you, whoever you are. I believe you just saved my life.”  
K: “Believe me, it was an accident.”  
Z: looks at the red lion “Is that a lion of Voltron.”  
K: “Um… Yeah! That’s right Zarkon Voltron is coming and you can’t stop us!”  
U: stands up  
Z: pulls out a gun “No! Stop that assassin!” Shoots Ulaz.  
S: punches Zarkon in the face and takes his gun “Sit still, shut up.”  
H: to Ulaz “Are you okay?”  
U: “Yeah, I’m fine. I think he missed.”  
Z: “He was going to kill me!”  
S: “Shut up Zarkon! Hunk, put Zarkon in the supply closet.”  
H: “Right. Putting Zarkon in a closet. Zarkon, closet. Closet, Zarkon. Zarkon, get in the closet!”  
Z: “But I am the emperor!”  
H: “In you go.” puts Zarkon in the closet.  
P: “Lance?”  
L: “Zarkon.”  
S: “What about him?”  
L: “He’s a lousy shot.” collapses onto the floor  
K: “Lance!”  
S: “We have to stop the bleeding!”  
H: “How bad is it? What can we do?”  
L: eyes start to flutter  
K: “Hey keep those eyes on me. Don’t give up on us.”  
L: “I used to have dreams about you. All those stories I heard of the paladins dancing in my head at night.”  
K: “What stories? Tell me what stories.”  
L: “When I was little I was going to marry you.”  
K: “Good idea! Let’s get married! If you stay alive I’ll marry you, okay?”  
L: eyes flick open and jumps to his feet “Hello Benjamin!” strikes a Mrs Robinson pose  
K: “Who’s Benjamin?”  
L: pushes Keith up against a wall “Watch out that Mullet!”  
H: “Is anyone confused because I am.”  
P: “Yeah, I think I’m getting a pounding in my head.”  
S: “I think that’s Zarkon in the closet.”  
P: “You’re not helping!”  
L: “Well now, enough of that. Time to get down to business.” somehow has Zarkon’s gun and points it at Keith  
K: “Oh hello, I thought we were getting married.”  
L: “I told you, I don’t dance.”  
S: “Keith, what’s he doing?”  
K: “What he’s been told to do.”  
P: “Where’d he get the gun?”  
K: “Hello Benjamin. He picked up from the chair.”  
L: “You noticed.” tries to shoot Keith but is out of ammunition.  
K: “I knew you would try something like this so I emptied the bullets and tied it up a bit.”  
L: “I know you did. That’s why I took the gun from the fruit bowl.”  
K: “I know you know that’s why I replaced the gun with a banana.”  
L: “Goodness, is killing you going to take all day?”  
K: “Why, are you in a rush?”  
L: “I’m not complaining.”  
K: “If you were in a hurry you could have killed me in the corn field.”  
L: “We’d only just meet. I’m a psychopath. I’m not rude.”  
H: “Lance, you’re not a psychopath.”  
L: “Oh, doesn’t anyone ever listen? Remember that one year where I was 'off the grid’? I was captured by Zarkon.”  
K: “Demons run, remember? That’s what they were working on. My bespoke psychopath.”  
L: “I’m all yours sweetie!” pulls Keith in for a light kiss and walks to the door “Shiro, Hunk, Pidge, don’t follow me.”  
K: “What? No warning for me?”  
L: “Too late my love. The deed is done and so are you.”  
K: staggers and clutches his chest  
S: “Keith, are you alright?”  
K: “Lance!?”  
L: “It was never going to be a gun for you. The red paladin who knows all kinds of warfare except maybe the cruelest.” walks out the door  
P: “What did Lance do to you?”  
K: “Poisoned me, but I’ll be alright. Well I’m not, I’m dying, but I have a plan.”  
H: “What’s the plan.”  
K: “Not dying. See, I’ll be fine!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next is Shallura


	3. The husbands of princess Allura

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A is Allura  
> S is Shiro  
> Hg is Haggar  
> Z is Zarkon

Hg: scrolls through Allura’s digital logs “It was foolish of you to write a daily log of all your experiences.” laughs to herself “You just visited the balmera again. Tell me princess, was it interesting?”  
A: Being held at gunpoint along with a disguised Shiro “You can stop now.”  
Hg: “A rejuvenation ceremony, interesting, and a picnic at Asgard?! Oh, sounds romantic.”  
A: grits her teeth “I dare you to keep going!”  
Hg: “Oh, and I will, because this is the ultimate guide to find Takashi Shirogane. I promise you one thing princess, we will find him and kill him.” scrolls some more “Fascinating, you recently visited Manhattan! What planet is that?”  
Z: “This is irrelevant.”  
Hg: “This woman is the known consort of Takashi Shirogane.”  
Z: “I suppose you are correct.”  
Hg: to Allura “So where is Takashi?”  
A: “I don’t have the slightest idea.”  
Hg: “Is that credible?”  
A: “It’s true!”  
Hg: “But you are the one he loves.”  
A: “No I’m not.”  
Hg: “You’re lying!”  
A: “Shiro does not and never has loved me. I’m not lying.”  
Hg: reads Allura’s mind “She isn’t lying. This is impossible! It must be a trick.”  
A: “This is no trick.”  
Hg: “But my information has to be correct, you are the woman who loves Takashi.”  
A: “Yes I am. I’ve never denied it. But who said he ever loved me back? He’s Takashi Shirogane. He doesn’t go around falling in love with people. And if you think he’s anything that small or ordinary than you don’t have the faintest idea of who you’re dealing with!”  
Hg: “My lord, I promise you that she is the perfect bait. When this woman is in danger Takashi will show up.”  
A: “You’re a moron. He will not come for me.”  
Hg: “He’s probably already here.”  
A: “He’s not here. He can’t be.”  
Hg: “Possibly on this ship.”  
A: “Then scan the ship. Go ahead do it!”  
S: still in disguise and nudges Allura on the arm “Allura.”  
A: “White hair, stupid metal arm, you can’t miss him!”  
S: “Allura.”  
A: “Go ahead and scan the whole parsect! He isn’t here! Who knows where he is right now, but I swear to you that he’s doing whatever he wants. He probably isn’t even thinking about me and I’m okay with that.”  
S: “Allura.”  
A: “When you love Shiro it’s like loving the stars themselves. You don’t expect a sunset to admire you back. And if I happen to find myself in danger let me tell you, Shiro isn’t stupid enough, sentimental enough, or in love enough to find himself standing in it with me!”  
S: squeezes Allura’s hand with his right arm and they lock gazes  
A: blushes “Oh.”  
S: “Hey princess.”  
A: huffs “Are you going to do your roots?”  
S: “You mean the roots of the sunset?” smiles  
A: “Don’t you dare.”  
S: “I’ll have to check with the stars themselves.”  
A: “Oh shut up! I’ll stall until backup arrives.”  
Z: “What is this conversation? Explain it to me.”  
A: points at Zarkon “You keep out of this.”  
S: “We have work to do.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If anyone wants to see a certian doctor who scene in Voltron form tell me what scene, episode, and characters and I'll be glad to do it.


End file.
